The Workplace Romance Dilemma: To Date or Not to Date Your Coworker?

The Workplace Romance Dilemma: To Date or Not to Date Your Coworker?

In the workplace, you're bound to encounter people who are attractive, intelligent and have a similar sense of humor. As a result, it's not uncommon for personal relationships to develop and grow between coworkers.

The problem is that these relationships can become complicated when they cross professional boundaries. In fact, workplace romances are often cited as one of the top issues in human resources (HR) departments across America.

Factors to Consider Before Diving into a Workplace Relationship

The nature of their relationship before dating (coworkers vs. supervisors). The level of authority one person has over the other. The overall culture of their company or organization. Their role within the company (i.e., who does what). The state laws governing this type of situation in their state or country.

It's important to note that most HR departments won't ban workplace romance outright because there are too many gray areas involved in making such decisions, so they typically handle these situations on a case-by-case basis depending on how severe they perceive them to beWorkplaces are often filled with diverse individuals, each contributing their unique skills and personalities to create a dynamic environment.

It's not uncommon for personal relationships to develop in a professional setting, leading to the classic dilemma: should you ask out your work crush? In this blog post, we'll explore the nuances of workplace romance, backed by data, to help you make an informed decision.

External Factors Influencing Workplace Romances

Workplace romance is nothing new, but it's also not an accepted norm. According to a survey conducted by the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM), 43% of Americans have dated a coworker at some point in their careers. This data indicates that workplace romances are not uncommon, but it also raises questions about the potential pitfalls.


The survey also found that many people do not think dating coworkers is appropriate:

  • 43% of employees say that dating a coworker is never OK.
  • 38% say it's only OK if you're in different departments.
  • 29% say it's only OK if you're in different locations (i.e., not working together).

Pros and Cons of Dating a Coworker

The Pros:

  1. Shared Interests: Working in the same industry often means shared professional interests and goals, providing a solid foundation for a relationship.
  2. Understanding of Work Stress: Your work crush can empathize with the unique challenges and stressors you face in your job, fostering a deeper connection.
  3. Increased Job Satisfaction: Research from the Journal of Marriage and Family suggests that individuals in happy relationships are more satisfied with their jobs. A successful workplace romance could contribute to your overall well-being.

The Cons:

  1. Professional Consequences: Dating a coworker can lead to awkwardness and potential fallout if the relationship doesn't work out. Moreover, it may violate company policies, leading to disciplinary actions.
  2. Perceptions and Bias: Colleagues and superiors might perceive favoritism, impacting your professional reputation and creating tension in the workplace.
  3. Legal Implications: In some cases, workplace romances could lead to legal complications, particularly if there is a power dynamic at play. Harassment claims or conflicts of interest may arise.

Asking Out Your Work Crush

How to Ask Out Your Work Crush: If you decide that the potential rewards outweigh the risks, here are some tips on navigating the delicate process of asking out your work crush:

  1. Read the Signals: Before making a move, ensure there is mutual interest. Friendly banter and shared laughter are good indicators.
  2. Choose the Right Setting: Opt for a casual setting outside of the office, such as a coffee shop or a social event, to create a more relaxed atmosphere.
  3. Be Respectful: If your crush declines, respect their decision gracefully. Avoid pressuring or making the workplace uncomfortable.

Navigating Workplace Romances with Caution and Clarity

Deciding whether to ask out your work crush requires careful consideration of both personal desires and potential professional consequences. While workplace romances can lead to fulfilling relationships, it's crucial to approach them with caution. Ultimately, understanding your company's policies, reading the signals, and being mindful of the potential outcomes can guide you in making a decision that aligns with your values and career aspirations.

Back to blog